If History is Any Guide

Rob and I have just survived yet another of the kids' patriotic programs. There is a regional event around here which I shall call Heap of America. It brings in thousands of elementary school kids to our very own Big Mac on campus to sing patriotic songs and cause traffic jams. Our school gets so fired up about it that they hold their own event every other year (perhaps we'll call it Heaplet of America). It isn't our favorite. Actually we loathe it. The kids miss class daily for about a month beforehand. The crowds are huge and unruly. In past years rival groups of Polynesians tried to outdo each other in hooting for their kids. Everyone is crammed into folding squeaky metal chairs in the gym. You can never see your child because ImaLou has got her beehive up a good six inches tonight or her husband LaPriel has a vintage 15 lb. video camera going directly in front of your child's face. This year both kids even had to sit and sing with the lights off for a slide show for one number. I told Rob "I will come to these to see my children, but I did NOT come to watch pictures of Neal Armstrong, or empty combat boots, or weeping children after Katrina. Bag the slide show!"
But really, we are deeply uncomfortable with the messages being taught. IMHO, it brings out an element of the people here which is 1.unflattering and 2.already ominpresent in the seventh month of the year. I would have to call it the kind of patriotism which confuses nationalism with rooting for the home sports team/wearing a flight suit on a battleship/beating ones chest.
Now, let's get it straight. Rob and MA are patriots. We're simply patriots of a different stripe. We believe that being American means appreciating the multiplicity of cultures that made America. It makes us happy to have kids from Argentina and Spain and Vietnam and China and India in the neighborhood, and it makes us squeamish to hear them singing about America as the One True Country. As Barbara Kingsolver says, "every country has its motto, and none of them is 'We're Number Two!'" As the melting pot or the salad bowl or whatever we are these days, we should be sensitive to the dual loyalties.
When Maddie was in first grade, she was singing "It's A Grand Old Flag" and was excited to perform it for us. She sang us a coda that had a line about "everything I love is within its borders". Rob quizzed her on this: "So, Maddie, is that true? You don't really like Nutella, or the Ferris Wheel at the Prater, or Ritter Sport or Apfelsaftgespritz, or Sissi or the Hofburg?" (and on and on) and poor Maddie was heartily confused. Six is a tender age to stare into the dark world of adult agendas.
We believe that being a good American also entails behaving with good grace in those other cultures. Just as missionaries are expected to be good emissaries of Christ for example, and not sit on the statue of the Buddha, we teach our children and our students to behave well abroad. Make an attempt not to talk loudly and wear neon T-shirts and matching his and hers white sneakers, like Marvin and Carol in David Sedaris's "Picka Pocketoni" (which if you have not read it, will make you squirt soda out your nose; you should run and get a copy immediately if you're in need of that sort of thing). Our experience is that we've found things that are easy to appreciate in every place we've been: the landscape in Chile, the drunk driving laws in Great Britain, the healthcare in Germany, and plenty of other examples.
The good news is that this year Maddie had two of the most inoffensive numbers on the program: Fifty Nifty United States (informational as well!) and the I Have A Dream speech song (cue the slide show again). Will's Neal Armstrong piece was also good, but essentially cancelled out by the third grade's medley of military anthems, for which we had to shell out four bucks to become the owners of a camouflage hat. Will owned camouflage pants in Vienna in 2005, a mistake I do not mean to duplicate. Ever.
The best news though is that we're done. This year we sat in front of neighbors who have been attending these since 1978. I am going to need a truckload of German chocolate to get me through that many patriotic programs.
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Comments

ohiolanges said…
Too funny! So when are you and Rob going to write and submit a new program for them to perform?

Maybe a song that includes the many ways to eat Nutella - we are having it with crepes tomorrow - can't wait!

Thanks for the entertainment!
Anonymous said…
Interesting thoughts. I agree with respecting other cultures when visiting them. We are certianly guest in there land. I do disagree with dual loyalties part. When you are a citizen in this country you can have pride and respect for your homeland and its rich cultures. We have never required new citizens to give that up. Your loaylty and willness to serve and protect your new home/motherland comes first and foremost. There in lies the problem that's been crerated in this country. We are no longer Americans. Our porgressive/stateism society has move us away from all being Americans to dividing us into ethic hyfed americans they teach false doctrine that because we are so different we need to redefined who we are, ie: African-American, Native-American, Irish-American and the list goes on and on. If we are citizens of this country, We are Americans first and foremost. Our alliegance is not to our home countries or cultures, but to this freeland and those who have paid the price for it's liberity by sacrifing all they have so that we might be free. The sad part is we have career political leaders in congress and a current and fromer president who have set at not our freedoms and liberities for the almighty dollar.
Dual loayties have only been one of many small changes which our leaders have brought about in the early 1900's to present day. These 19th century leaders willfully moving or county into a one world government and have sought to weaken and distroy this great country. They have have changed and altered the consitiution to the piont that our foundng fathers would not recognize this country.

We are seeing the decline and fall of the greatest nation that has existed on the face of this earth. Mainly because we have set at naught the constitution, righteous laws and have called evil good and good evil. We have not listen to the prophets and learned from the mistakes of our fore-fathers from other nations.

We have heard that when in Rome do as the Romans do. Countless people immigrated to this country from around the world and they worked hard at becoming Americans and living the american way of life not an Irish-Americans or some other blank-Americans way. They assimlated into our culture, They shared and adopted in our greatness. Theywere called to fight for and against those who wanted to perpatraite injustice, force socialism and comunisum around the world. Often they were called to fight and kill distant relatives and family friends from their homelands. There was no room for dual loaylities only for the loaylty of the American cause and dream.
As I see it dual loyaltiy has no place in american culture. What has a place is respect for where we can from and how it makes us more greatful to be just and AMERICAN.
Well I guess I expressed my comments enough. opposing views are healthy in families don't you think. Respectfylly submitted Uncle Elvin.

Ps I'm not the most computer literate. please excuse and spelling or gramatical errors. I don't know how to get this silly machine to do spell check in this comment section.

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